toodldo_4julie: home

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going home tonight... i don't really want to. :

there are three things that i'm going home for... my dad, my friends, and work. if it wasn't for them, i wouldn't go home to state college :(

the horses won't be there...that was most important thing that was only at state college. my friends aren't all at state college, and if my dad wasn't in state college, i'd probably not go home other than just to visit the friends that are there. work can always be found elsewhere. *sigh*

i had a thought the other day. maybe life should just be a bunch of movies all grouped together, and some people get the good comedies, and some get the horror movies, and some get the chick flicks, and some get the really depressing films. if lives were films, we could rewrite the scripts, and change what we don't like. if we change the scripts in this life, it messes up the whole life half the time, and that's dangerous. but movie scripts are always being revised and such, so it wouldn't have as many bad effects as changing lives around would.

tip: don't step on a stack of papers that are upside down if they're stapled, and the little prongs are sticking up in the air. i did so yesterday, and it's not a pleasant feeling..


Mood: sad but intrigued
Music: no music, watching moulin rouge..
Browsing: aww shucks...

toodldo_4julie:

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the one thing that's been a constant in my life over the past two years is now gone. the last thing i had that i looked forward to so much is gone. because stupid people do stupid things, now the stable's breaking apart.

i'll never ride Buddy or Micah or Cool or Jack or Toby or Dusty or Magnum or Seymour or Timmy or Lady EVER AGAIN.

i don't think i've been this depressed, through all the emotional stress and every conflict i've had w/ people since i got to college. this upsets me more than i can possibly say, and i think maybe this is just a sign that LIFE EFFING SUCKS... and i wish i'd NEVER been BORN.


Mood: beyond depressed...
Music: loving the alien - velvet revolver

toodldo_4julie: snow

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i stayed up all night, and played in the snow w/ two friends. it was fun. i think i needed that.

oh, and snowball fights generally don't work out well if your gloves don't let go of the snow when you try to throw the balls... :P

and hot chocolate tastes really good after a couple hours in the snow...starting at 3:30 a.m., and snowplaying until 5 or so.. :P

and everything seems ridiculously funny when there is no sleep... things like people falling down snow-covered hills on their faces (one of the friends was sledding down a steep hill, and the laundry basket-yes, we were sledding in an old laundry basket- tipped..hehehe) and things like the echo of our voices as we laughed in the cafeteria at breakfast.. when there were only like, 8 other people in there eating ;)




Mood: giddy (probably exhausted, just don't know it yet)
Music: the roomie's asleep, and i can't sit still enough to wear headphones
Browsing: like i'd browse a link.. phhbt. :D

toodldo_4julie: good things happen to good people

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i guess i'm a bad person?


Mood: happy for others...
Browsing: stupid [bleep]ing loans >: |

toodldo_4julie: something

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why do we always seem to enjoy the most what hurts us the most?


why does caring quickly turn into worrying?


why is the line fine between love and hate?


how is it that sometimes, no matter how much time and/or effort you put into something, it doesn't work out the way it was supposed to?


are we currently in the life cycle, or the death cycle? is everything just a part of life, or is everything a part of/leading to death? or are they just the same thing?


Mood: seeking for...
Music: Velvet Revolver - Set Me Free