Aar0n: Thanks, I Guess...

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I've been having quite a bit of anxiety lately. I guess it comes from my medical problems and other scary things. My friend, Richie is one of the assistant pastors at my church. I went to him to help me talk through my problems, and he gave me a very heartening hymn to read by John Newton. Don't feel bad if you don't get much out of it. If you aren't a Christian, I wouldn't expect you to care, anyway. Read through it though, because the poem itself isn't the point of this story.

I asked the Lord that I might grow
In faith, and love, and every grace;
Might more of His salvation know,
And seek, more earnestly, His face.

’Twas He who taught me thus to pray,
And He, I trust, has answered prayer!
But it has been in such a way,
As almost drove me to despair.

I hoped that in some favored hour,
At once He’d answer my request;
And by His love’s constraining pow’r,
Subdue my sins, and give me rest.

Instead of this, He made me feel
The hidden evils of my heart;
And let the angry pow’rs of hell
Assault my soul in every part.

Yea more, with His own hand He seemed
Intent to aggravate my woe;
Crossed all the fair designs I schemed,
Blasted my gourds, and laid me low.

Lord, why is this, I trembling cried,
Wilt thou pursue thy worm to death?
“’Tis in this way, the Lord replied,
I answer prayer for grace and faith.

These inward trials I employ,
From self, and pride, to set thee free;
And break thy schemes of earthly joy,
That thou may’st find thy all in Me.”

I felt really good about this hymn. It seemed to explain my problems without trying to falsely tell me that I was going to be alright. Anyway, I came to wonder what John Newton had gone through for him to write such a wonderful hymn. I googled him. Apparently, Johnny was big in the slave trade. In fact, even after he became a Christian, he continued to work heavily in the slave trade. It amazes me sometimes that people can so easily separate their religious and personal lives. They think that it doesn't matter what you do or think or say just because you go to church on Sunday. Anyway, it's still a good hymn.


Groovin' to: Vertical Horizon - Best I Ever Had
Surfing: The Classic Tales Podcast

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