nitrusoxyde: Mistake

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Mistake (n,v) 1. Posting 'fools fall silent' when 30,000 members of SomethingAwful flood your xanga site. Nice going Cory.


Mood: Avenged
Music: Sirius 21 - Alt Nation

nitrusoxyde: Posting for Posterity

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Well, obviously (as has been indicated by the drama surrounding me), I've been dumped by Cory. What makes it so hard isn't that we were so close, as I was so comfortable in my relationship with her. Cory and I never argued for the entire time we've known each other. We shared alot of special memories and had alot in common.

I'm writing this because I need something to do. And idle mind is a playground for evil, or in my case depressing thoughts.

We argued about a week before the break up about her never calling me... I didn't get the hint though. The final straw was simply me wanting to visit.

She's only 17, and can't handle a serious relationship. I can understand this, but I guess I just didn't think we were that serious.

I feel horrible. Its like I've been trying to find something, and once I have it - I lost it. She was everything I ever wanted to see in a girlfriend. She reminded me of myself. (And if you say 'opposites attract' ... just don't.)

Last night I realized just how bad I'm taking this. She emailed me asking for my address to mail my stuff back. Hurt doesn't do it justice. After pouring my heart out to someone I'd never met... I was feeling better.

In my improved state, I wrote myself a letter that I read every time I get feeling bad, and it helps.

I guess my only reason for posting here is to do what everyone else does, vent. I'd paint these words on city streets if it weren't so dramatic. I just need to let it out, so I can try to be at peace with this.

Some day, after Cory's life is straight - I hope our paths cross again. She said she'd love me forever, and that I was the only guy she'd ever trusted with her heart... I just hope she doesn't change her mind as she grows up.


Mood: Obviously :(
Music: Seether w/ Amy Lee - Broken (Sirius 21 Alt Nation)

nitrusoxyde: Wonderwall- GOOD SONG

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Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realised what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do about you now
Backbeat the word was on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
The way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
but I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day?
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realised what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

And all the roads that lead you there were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me ?
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me
You're gonna be the one that saves me


Mood: Still. Dumped.

nitrusoxyde: Dumped

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Yea :-/


Mood: WTF
Music: Oasis - Wonderwall

nitrusoxyde: Diversion And Canned Chicken

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I got a diversion for my misdimeanor! :D $310 and I'm clear :D

ALSO - start here


end here



Mood: Pain
Music: Incubus - Talk Show on Mute (Sirius 21 - Alt Nation)